CK (
nyandereneko) wrote2019-04-05 09:00 am
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Entry tags:
Admiration
Word Count: 1,152
Summary: She’s always seen him as something special, and she knows that’s the last thing he’s ever wanted. But sometimes she just can’t seem to help herself when it comes to admiring the man she loves so much.
*Author’s Note*: Happy FB release day! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! I’m losing it I cannot believe we’ve come this far. When the original rumor that a new and complete rendition of the series was being animated, I honestly didn’t know how to feel or react. It still seemed a bit like a dream, so surreal that this story that I’ve adored since childhood, that had a hand in shaping me as a person, would finally be coming to life again the way it was meant to be told. So here’s me gushing about the man I fell in love with from said story, and heads up there are serious ending spoilers for the plot because my ship verse takes place post canon. I still haven’t figured out all the logistics of this ship verse yet, but…I’ve been too busy, and also preoccupied with my own excitement and giddiness to really care lol. Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoy!
The café was quiet, or perhaps it was just a trick of her senses. She was a bit distracted at the moment, after all. Not entirely of her own volition, but she was the one that’d decided she was content to just sit across from this special person and admire him. The gentle kindness in his eyes that masked the deep-seated pain he’d been valiantly striving to overcome through the years. The glossy sheen of his hair, as silver and shimmering as a star in the night sky. At one time, he’d probably resented everything about his appearance. An unnatural hair color that served as a physical reminder of the chains he’d been bound by since birth. Chains he and everyone else that was trapped by them thought would never break, but rather just continue to tighten their chokehold indefinitely.
Now all of that was in the past. It’d been a couple years since that fateful day, more accurately the fateful number of days that’d suddenly and permanently dismantled that poisonous curse once and for all. It’d been seemingly random, the writing on the wall clear and foreboding for the few individuals that wanted more than anything for things to stay the same. The remaining majority didn’t want that, though; a sole, complicated part of them was obligated to maintain a death grip on the one thing that was killing them, while the genuine parts of them wondered if they were ever going to be able to truly live their lives the way they deserved. Little slivers of hope made themselves known here and there, but the strength and opportunity to make the most of them had persistently remained significantly out of reach.
“Do I have something on my face?”
His question startled her, and she couldn’t stop herself from blushing at being caught in the act. “Oh, no, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be rude or anything. I just…well, maybe it’s a little too embarrassing to say.”
“I think you should say it, anyway,” he coaxed, taking a sip of the warm drink resting in front of him.
This man had once been so reserved, so skeptical and suspicious of everything. Terrified of losing his friends, his family, his will to live…well, he’d already lost each of those things at least once in his life so far. There were numerous other instances of him being forced to suffer a fate he didn’t deserve, to shoulder burdens that no human being should ever be expected to bear, especially alone. And although he’d spent many of those vulnerable, detrimental years alone, he’d never have to face anything that lonely or horrific again. The supporters, the companions he had now wouldn’t stand for it, and would never abandon him to such a dismal fate. She knew she certainly wouldn’t.
“I just really love you,” she admitted, quickly gulping down some of her own beverage. Hopefully she could play off the flush in her cheeks as a consequence of the liquid’s near scalding temperature. She coughed a bit, but before he could reply, she figured it might do her some good to elaborate a little. “I know that’s kind of random, out of the blue. And intense…a little too serious to just say with a straight face, or in a casual manner. But I feel like it’s important for you to know. I think it’s important for you to hear it. Even if you say you won’t forget, being reminded always makes me feel good, whether it’s relevant or not. Just being reminded that someone cares about me…so, I want to make sure I do that for you sometimes. I know it seems silly, unnecessary, but—”
“Thank you.” He took her hand, noting how her fingers trembled against his own. “For being here. For being kind.”
“I’m nowhere near as kind as you,” she disputed. “Actually, I mean…thank you. I know I shouldn’t put compliments like that down, so thank you. For saying something nice like that. But I don’t want you to forget all you’ve done for me, too.”
She could go on and on about all the things she was grateful to him for, but she knew he didn’t really enjoy that type of thing. Putting someone on a pedestal, admiring and respecting them from afar…it gets lonely. For you and for them. When everyone around you puts you above them, only you, they make it impossible to form any real and meaningful connections—on both sides. They may feel that they’re doing you a favor by venerating you, complimenting you, congratulating you, but that was never something Yuki wanted. He’d been treated as special, amazing, untouchable, while behind the scenes all it’d done was driven him into a dark, deserted void. All he’d ever truly wanted was to be included. To be an equal, to make friends, to be involved. Being special had only ever isolated him, ostracized him, put him in the perfect position to be convinced that he was actually worthless. But he was so much more than that…to her, he was a beneficial, irreplaceable presence in her life.
“I’ll try not to do that, then. If it really means that much to you.” He smiled with his eyes, an expression brimming with appreciation and gratitude, and her breath hitched. Such a sweet, tender face, offering a sentiment that warmed her heart and soothed her soul. She’d heard there used to be a time when such a smile couldn’t have existed, a time when that side of him was being battered and bruised, then kept locked away for his own self-preservation.
“It does,” she insisted. “You do. You mean a lot to me. Ah, I guess I already said that.” She hid her face in her hands. “Sorry, I don’t mean to repeat myself. Just, thanks for going out with me today. Thanks for spending time with me.”
His smile brightened, and he grasped one of her hands again, squeezing it reassuringly. “Thank you for wanting to spend time with me in the first place. I think I’d like to do stuff like this more often.”
A bold proposition, one she certainly wasn’t prepared for. But they were dating, so it should have been a given that they’d be doing something like this again, right? Well, she was so caught up in her emotions, it was often hard for her to remember they were really more than friends in the first place. To wrap her head around the fact that this man felt any measure of the same fondness she felt towards him for her in return. But he did, and she’d never stop admiring him for who he was, how he made her feel, all he did for her. She mustered the courage to face him directly, meeting his compassionate eyes as she smiled and finally gave him a fitting reply.
“I think I’d like that, too.”
Summary: She’s always seen him as something special, and she knows that’s the last thing he’s ever wanted. But sometimes she just can’t seem to help herself when it comes to admiring the man she loves so much.
*Author’s Note*: Happy FB release day! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! I’m losing it I cannot believe we’ve come this far. When the original rumor that a new and complete rendition of the series was being animated, I honestly didn’t know how to feel or react. It still seemed a bit like a dream, so surreal that this story that I’ve adored since childhood, that had a hand in shaping me as a person, would finally be coming to life again the way it was meant to be told. So here’s me gushing about the man I fell in love with from said story, and heads up there are serious ending spoilers for the plot because my ship verse takes place post canon. I still haven’t figured out all the logistics of this ship verse yet, but…I’ve been too busy, and also preoccupied with my own excitement and giddiness to really care lol. Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoy!
_____
The café was quiet, or perhaps it was just a trick of her senses. She was a bit distracted at the moment, after all. Not entirely of her own volition, but she was the one that’d decided she was content to just sit across from this special person and admire him. The gentle kindness in his eyes that masked the deep-seated pain he’d been valiantly striving to overcome through the years. The glossy sheen of his hair, as silver and shimmering as a star in the night sky. At one time, he’d probably resented everything about his appearance. An unnatural hair color that served as a physical reminder of the chains he’d been bound by since birth. Chains he and everyone else that was trapped by them thought would never break, but rather just continue to tighten their chokehold indefinitely.
Now all of that was in the past. It’d been a couple years since that fateful day, more accurately the fateful number of days that’d suddenly and permanently dismantled that poisonous curse once and for all. It’d been seemingly random, the writing on the wall clear and foreboding for the few individuals that wanted more than anything for things to stay the same. The remaining majority didn’t want that, though; a sole, complicated part of them was obligated to maintain a death grip on the one thing that was killing them, while the genuine parts of them wondered if they were ever going to be able to truly live their lives the way they deserved. Little slivers of hope made themselves known here and there, but the strength and opportunity to make the most of them had persistently remained significantly out of reach.
“Do I have something on my face?”
His question startled her, and she couldn’t stop herself from blushing at being caught in the act. “Oh, no, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be rude or anything. I just…well, maybe it’s a little too embarrassing to say.”
“I think you should say it, anyway,” he coaxed, taking a sip of the warm drink resting in front of him.
This man had once been so reserved, so skeptical and suspicious of everything. Terrified of losing his friends, his family, his will to live…well, he’d already lost each of those things at least once in his life so far. There were numerous other instances of him being forced to suffer a fate he didn’t deserve, to shoulder burdens that no human being should ever be expected to bear, especially alone. And although he’d spent many of those vulnerable, detrimental years alone, he’d never have to face anything that lonely or horrific again. The supporters, the companions he had now wouldn’t stand for it, and would never abandon him to such a dismal fate. She knew she certainly wouldn’t.
“I just really love you,” she admitted, quickly gulping down some of her own beverage. Hopefully she could play off the flush in her cheeks as a consequence of the liquid’s near scalding temperature. She coughed a bit, but before he could reply, she figured it might do her some good to elaborate a little. “I know that’s kind of random, out of the blue. And intense…a little too serious to just say with a straight face, or in a casual manner. But I feel like it’s important for you to know. I think it’s important for you to hear it. Even if you say you won’t forget, being reminded always makes me feel good, whether it’s relevant or not. Just being reminded that someone cares about me…so, I want to make sure I do that for you sometimes. I know it seems silly, unnecessary, but—”
“Thank you.” He took her hand, noting how her fingers trembled against his own. “For being here. For being kind.”
“I’m nowhere near as kind as you,” she disputed. “Actually, I mean…thank you. I know I shouldn’t put compliments like that down, so thank you. For saying something nice like that. But I don’t want you to forget all you’ve done for me, too.”
She could go on and on about all the things she was grateful to him for, but she knew he didn’t really enjoy that type of thing. Putting someone on a pedestal, admiring and respecting them from afar…it gets lonely. For you and for them. When everyone around you puts you above them, only you, they make it impossible to form any real and meaningful connections—on both sides. They may feel that they’re doing you a favor by venerating you, complimenting you, congratulating you, but that was never something Yuki wanted. He’d been treated as special, amazing, untouchable, while behind the scenes all it’d done was driven him into a dark, deserted void. All he’d ever truly wanted was to be included. To be an equal, to make friends, to be involved. Being special had only ever isolated him, ostracized him, put him in the perfect position to be convinced that he was actually worthless. But he was so much more than that…to her, he was a beneficial, irreplaceable presence in her life.
“I’ll try not to do that, then. If it really means that much to you.” He smiled with his eyes, an expression brimming with appreciation and gratitude, and her breath hitched. Such a sweet, tender face, offering a sentiment that warmed her heart and soothed her soul. She’d heard there used to be a time when such a smile couldn’t have existed, a time when that side of him was being battered and bruised, then kept locked away for his own self-preservation.
“It does,” she insisted. “You do. You mean a lot to me. Ah, I guess I already said that.” She hid her face in her hands. “Sorry, I don’t mean to repeat myself. Just, thanks for going out with me today. Thanks for spending time with me.”
His smile brightened, and he grasped one of her hands again, squeezing it reassuringly. “Thank you for wanting to spend time with me in the first place. I think I’d like to do stuff like this more often.”
A bold proposition, one she certainly wasn’t prepared for. But they were dating, so it should have been a given that they’d be doing something like this again, right? Well, she was so caught up in her emotions, it was often hard for her to remember they were really more than friends in the first place. To wrap her head around the fact that this man felt any measure of the same fondness she felt towards him for her in return. But he did, and she’d never stop admiring him for who he was, how he made her feel, all he did for her. She mustered the courage to face him directly, meeting his compassionate eyes as she smiled and finally gave him a fitting reply.
“I think I’d like that, too.”