Reconciliation (pt. 3)
Jul. 10th, 2020 08:00 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Word Count: 4,571
Summary: Awoken from her slumber by the sound of frantic scratching at her window in the middle of the night, Nova is drawn into a conflict that she knows she’s better off avoiding…but when it comes to him, she just can’t seem to stay away.
Author’s Note: The last of my loosely associated 3 part drabble set for this week, and I can’t believe how long it ended up being fhieslfes I really am just on a roll when it comes to this stuff. I’m not sure if my posting will start to slow down a little soon because I’m starting to get a little busy with other things, but I still plan on posting more fics for this ship (and others) it’s just that this one, obviously, inspires me in a way I haven’t encountered in awhile, which is pretty nice…I guess I don’t have too much more to say than that lol. Thank you for reading! :D
“Nova! Nova, wake up!”
That voice…it was vaguely familiar to her, although not instantly recognizable. It didn’t sound like the product of just another dream; it was too clear, too defined. The grating noise of something sharp frantically scraping against glass jarred her even more, and the young woman’s ears twitched as she struggled to open her eyes, glancing around without making any effort to move just yet. The scraping intensified, the voice continued beckoning to her in that same distressed tone, begging her to do something she couldn’t quite make out. Rubbing her eyes and pushing the covers back, she sat up slowly, posture going rigid as her eyes finally fell upon the form that was awaiting her at the window.
“C’mon, don’t just sit there and stare! Let me in!”
Throwing the covers off and sliding out of bed in one smooth motion, Nova hurried over and pushed the panes open as quickly and quietly as she could manage. “Mao? What are you--?”
The lean black cat cut her off. “There’s no time. I need you to transform and come with me--”
“Wait, what?”
“I just said there’s no time!”
Well, that may have been true, but she had no way of knowing why, or what the panicked feline’s urgent words were referring to. “Yeah, but I’m not--”
“I’ll explain on the way, just come on!”
She looked over her shoulder at the dark, hushed room she’d be leaving behind, feeling the cold tendrils of apprehension and worry pinning her to the spot. Whatever it was he wanted her for, it couldn’t have been anything good, judging by the desperation in his eyes and tone. Was she really prepared to go barreling head first into a dangerous situation, one that she had no way of knowing or even predicting the details of? Wouldn’t it be better for her to convince him to give her at least some sort of explanation before she decided (perhaps unwisely) to get involved in whatever he was so insistent on receiving her help with?
“Mao, listen to me, I’m not--”
“Hei’s in trouble!”
Ah, those were simultaneously the words she needed to hear most, and the words she wished she’d never heard in the first place. How could she possibly turn him down or convince herself to back out when he appealed to her with something like that? Cursing under her breath, she threw on the first acceptable outfit she could find before taking on her feline form and following him back down the route he’d taken to reach her. Rushing through the streets like their lives depended on it, Nova knew that although theirs weren’t necessarily on the line at the moment, someone else’s definitely was, and that solitary thought seemed to be the only one her mind was capable of focusing on.
The perpetually moonless nights always filled her with an unfortunate, almost nostalgic sense of melancholy. She’d been plagued by bittersweet feelings ever since that tragic day had struck little more than a decade ago, forever altering the appearance of the world, and more importantly changing the shape of its course. The absence of that soothing silver glow that never failed to make her feel serene and at peace was striking, devastating…it was a glow that she could look upon and smile almost every time without fail, reflecting on and admiring the beauty of that radiant, ethereal light.
There was no such light to guide her or illuminate her destination this evening, though; only the blur of black fur that she struggled to keep up with as it raced down narrow alleyways and skidded around structures as her own paws pounded across the pavement, fiercely fighting to keep up. She wanted to ask him what was wrong, where they were going, to find out exactly what kind of trouble he was leading her to…but part of her also didn’t care. If Hei was in trouble and needed her help, what did the circumstances or specifics of the situation really matter? She wasn’t suddenly going to turn her back on him or change her mind, even if she knew that would be best. Lately, she’d become more and more insufferable in that regard, even more of a stranger to herself.
Rounding another corner, Nova barely managed to duck and roll out of the way of fumbling steps as she unexpectedly got caught up in the thick of battle. Paws scrabbling across the asphalt, she hissed and dodged to and fro, seeking out the quickest route to remove her from the immediate path of danger. She couldn’t tell whose feet were whose from this height, from this angle, and she paused to catch her breath once she’d finally managed to steer clear of being stepped on. Turning her gaze skywards to determine who was who in this startlingly frantic free for all, she managed to pick out the form of the man that she’d come for with relative ease…luckily for him, the familiar sight of his uniform made him easy to pick out.
Eyes darting around like a fly, frantically searching for the first opening that presented itself, Nova launched herself at one of the stragglers. She caught them just as they were raising their arm, preparing to fire a potentially lethal shot into the fray. Ensuring she angled herself just enough to land a blow that knocked them off balance, she scrambled up the perpetrator’s arm, digging her claws into their shoulder before assaulting their vulnerable face with a merciless barrage of razor sharp swipes. Swaying and stumbling around as they struggled to process what was happening, what strange creature had attacked them, Nova heard Mao shout something that she couldn’t make out from the chaos of her current position. The familiar sound of Hei’s cord cut through the air not long after, securing itself around the target’s neck while still managing to avoid her somehow; an impressive testament to his experience and skill.
“Move!” His voice caught her off guard, and her brain lagged between the battle she was currently engaged in and her struggle to interpret exactly what he was saying, what his command meant…that it was directed at her in the first place. “Nova, move now! Right now!”
His repetition seemed to jar her mind enough to make his words make sense, or at least compel her to act. Kicking off the stranger as hard as she could, she didn’t have enough time to determine where she was launching herself in the first place. She wasn’t preoccupied by that concern for long, though, as it was swiftly swept away by the distraction of the abrupt, alarming crackle of electricity that raised her fur as soon as she’d broken physical contact with her previous opponent. The sparking energy that made the back half of her fur stand on end sent her into a panic, and she hit the ground with a thud, ears ringing and vision blurring a bit as she shook her head in an attempt to expedite her recovery.
There wasn’t any time to spare. As soon as her vision cleared and came into focus, Nova caught sight of another assailant advancing on Hei from behind. Exchanging a swift, silent look of understanding with Mao, the two raven-furred felines raced forward, ambushing the attacker from above and below simultaneously. Nova could tell that Hei must have been caught up in this skirmish for a while, or the fight had just been arduous enough to take a lot out of him, if the labored sound of his ragged panting was any indication. His movements and strikes didn’t waver in the slightest, though, and both she and Mao dodged out of the way just in time for him to knock his opponent’s feet out from under them.
Nova stood back and watched in mild horror as Hei slammed their head to the ground, obscuring their face with his hand as he delivered a final shock that quickly turned their seizing body to stillness. Getting back on his feet after ensuring that the job was indeed done, Hei did a quick sweep of their surroundings before carefully removing his mask. Nova didn’t fail to notice the way his hands trembled, and the sight of it made her heart ache with a sympathy, a tenderness that she knew she needed to avoid feeling towards him at all costs.
“What the hell were you thinking?”
The angry edge in his voice made her flinch, and Nova curled in on herself, tucking her tail around her paws. Swiveling her ears, the young woman realized as the conversation continued that the irritated accusation wasn’t actually directed at her, and she craned her neck to watch as this new, heated conflict played out before her.
“Bringing her here, getting her involved…what’s wrong with you?”
“What’s wrong with me?” Mao scoffed, his tail twitching in indignance. “What’s wrong with you? I just saved your life, we both did--”
“I had it under control--”
“Oh, bullshit.” His tail lashed more fiercely in exasperation, his physical stance reflecting the depth of his annoyance and frustration with Hei’s apparent lack of gratitude. “Just like you always have it under control, right? Just like you can lone wolf every assignment you’re given? And that’s why you were assigned a team in the first place, right? So you can just brush us off after you get the info, whenever it’s convenient for you--”
“She’s not one of us!” Hei snapped, gesturing sharply in her direction. Nova winced, ears pinned flat against her head as she shrunk against the ground. The way he singled her out only made her feel worse, and she couldn’t help thinking he wouldn’t have been half as upset if she wasn’t so useless, nothing more than an unfortunate liability. “None of this has anything to do with her, and your first thought was to go out of your way to drag her into it anyway? Seriously, what were you thinking? She’s not just another operative, or even a proper Contractor. What did you expect her to do, did you really think she’d be able to--”
“But she did help!” Mao defended hotly, circling around to stand in front of her. “She--”
“Yeah, she got in the way, and almost ended up shocked to death as a result. Is that what being helpful is to you?”
“Just shut up! Shut up! That’s enough!” A painful silence permeated the air as Nova reverted to her human form, wiping some tears from her eyes as she stood. “I get it, alright? I’m sorry I’m not formidable and reliable like you, I’m sorry I don’t have any cool, lethal powers that--”
“It’s not about that,” he barked, flourishing his arm in a heated gesture of negation. The desolate, almost pitiable look in his eyes practically shattered her heart on the spot. “None of this is. Do you not remember anything I told you before? About how dangerous this shit is? About how you’re smart, capable, and you need to use that to get as far away from all of this as possible--”
“What you gave me was advice,” she corrected curtly. “Advice that I can choose to take or leave. But you can’t tell me what to do. You can’t make me stay away, stay out of all of this if I don’t want to. I’m not stupid, I understand the risks.”
“No, clearly, you don’t,” he retorted bitterly. “Because if you did--”
“Hey, can I get, like, a thank you or something at least?” she huffed, crossing her arms. “If it’s so dangerous and everything, don’t you think I deserve that much? I mean, I showed up despite the risks because I was worried--”
“Is that what you want?” he asked, his demeanor turning cold and mocking as he brushed by her, purposefully shoving her out of the way as he went. “A medal? Some kind of reward for showing up and getting in the way?”
Well, now she was really getting angry. If his goal was to offend her, he was doing quite a stellar job of it. She turned to face him as he stalked off, her blood boiling resentfully in her veins. “No, smartass, I think some basic respect and gratitude is the least you could--”
The remainder of her riled up retort got stuck in her throat as she noticed the slight, almost imperceptible way he wobbled as he walked. She narrowed her eyes, realizing upon closer inspection that he was holding one of his arms; and not in a casual, normal way, either. She took a few cautious steps towards him and reached out, stopping him in his tracks. He winced at her touch and tried to pull away as she coaxed him to reveal his arm, but she endured despite his protests. Tightening her grip, she managed to convince him to unveil the injury he was so stubbornly bent on concealing.
“Look, it’s nothing. I’m fine, would you just--”
“You’re fine?” Nova replied incredulously, doing her best to not dissolve into tears at the sight of the angry red gash that tore through both fabric and skin.
“Yes, I’m fine,” he repeated, trying to swallow the mixture of resentment and shame he felt when she looked at him like that. “I’m used to it, it’s nothing I can’t--”
“Hei, shut up,” she interrupted weakly, doing her best to reinforce her resolve, to hold herself together in the face of his foolish pride. “You’re not fine, and even if you were, I’m not going to just ignore this. You’re hurt, period. It needs to be treated--”
“I’ll do it myself,” he insisted, jerking his arm away and gritting his teeth as he instantly regretted the force of the movement. “I always do.”
“That doesn’t make it okay…” Nova muttered under her breath. “Will you at least let me help you take care of it?”
“What?” he asked, blinking a few times in confusion. He certainly wasn’t used to receiving such kind offers…he couldn’t even remember the last time someone had helped him treat his wounds, or even offered to.
“Let me go back with you. I’ll be discreet, I swear. I’ll even climb up the tree by the window and come in as a cat if you want. I won’t draw any suspicion. Seriously, I just…” She wrung her hands sheepishly, dropping her gaze to the ground and obscuring her flushed face with her hair as she continued, “I just want to make sure you’re alright.”
Well, he couldn’t exactly say no to that, could he? Maybe he could, but he’d just end up looking like an even bigger asshole, and despite his reservations he didn’t really have it in him to push back any harder than he already was. Obviously she wasn’t going to just drop the issue…and there was something in the way her voice quivered when she spoke that softened his heart and his resolve.
“Fine. I’ll let you in through the window.”
Taken aback by his sudden change of heart, Nova morphed into her cat form without another word, sprinting off in the direction of his apartment. It was almost dismaying that she found the place so easily…it wasn’t like she visited that often, but her limbs moved on auto pilot, leading her back to the seemingly innocuous building that already held so many emotions and memories for her. Shuddering at the recollection of what had transpired the last time she’d been here, she did her best to push past it, scrambling up the tree outside his window with ease.
She draped herself across a branch while she waited for him, idly swaying her tail as she listened intently for the conspicuous click of a lock or creek of a door. This neighborhood was so quiet, peaceful…it struck her as somewhat strange, almost ironic, considering the activities that at least one of the building’s tenants regularly engaged in. She examined the branches that stretched and twisted all around her, almost like they were forming a nest of their own, dotted with delicate leaves and rocking gently in the occasional breeze that blew by.
The scene was so serene, so still…and yet a disturbing dispute had played out a mere few blocks away not even ten minutes ago. She glanced at the sparkling sheen of her tail, feeling a pang of nostalgic longing for the silvery light that should have been streaming through the branches, too, complementing the countless stars that glittered in the dark, gloomy sky. She knew that light was one she may never see again…but if the opportunity to appreciate it at least once more meant that the present stars would vanish, subsequently taking the man she’d come here to meet with them…it wasn’t worth it, at least in her eyes.
It took longer than she expected for him to return, but upon further consideration she realized he’d probably stopped to regroup with the rest of his team, or perhaps relay some kind of report. She’d already formed a questionably shaky alliance with Mao, if his willingness to beseech her aid was any indication, and she was at least vaguely aware of Yin’s presence and role in their little group. A Doll with the ability to see through water, the medium of her surveillance…she didn’t say much, just like any other Doll, and part of Nova wondered how she’d even ended up being recruited in the first place.
Then again, the less she knew about any of them, the better…but it didn’t seem like she was going to be able to maintain a reasonable distance for much longer. Not if she kept this up, if she kept going along with things, inserting herself even when she knew she wasn’t needed (or perhaps even wanted)…but she just couldn’t seem to help herself. And hey, even if Mao’s judgment wasn’t the best, the fact that he considered her a viable asset at all brought her a rare sense of fulfillment she knew she needed to ignore, but that she relished and appreciated anyway. At least someone thought she could be useful for something, for once.
She perked up as she finally heard him arrive, swiveling her ears as she crept towards the end of the branch and waited for him to slide the glass open so she could make her way inside. She cleared the thin bars that formed a kind of barrier under the windowsill, landing on the firm floor of the interior with the same poise and grace that could be expected of any feline. Although her cat form was unique and convenient, she wasn’t actually in the habit of employing it that much outside of special circumstances where it just seemed the most natural thing to do. She had to admit, she’d been getting more mileage out of this form over the past few weeks than she had in months. It felt a bit peculiar to be using it as a means to meet up with someone rather than just a reliable way to avoid her problems for a while.
Transitioning to her human form as Hei shut the window and drew the curtain behind her, she got to work sifting through the first aid kit he’d apparently already laid out on the floor. She didn’t know the first thing about first aid, honestly, but wrapping a wound couldn’t be that hard, right? She knew that was a stupid assumption to make, but she couldn’t just do nothing, she couldn’t live with herself if she’d just run off and let him drag himself back here to tend to his wounds all on his own. Sure, he may have been used to it, but that seemed like such a lonely, depressing existence in her eyes…despite knowing how upset he must still be with her, she couldn’t turn her back on him. The truth was that, as she’d stated before, all she really wanted was to make sure he was okay.
She waited for him to get himself settled, examining him with hesitant, guilty eyes. Here, behind closed doors, it was almost as if all the life had drained from his face, and even his entire form. In the company of someone that knew the truth, he didn’t have to put on a performance, to pretend to be someone or something he wasn’t. But the sight of his true face, the emptiness and misery that seemed to practically pulse out of his every pore…that was almost more painful to her than the sight of his unfortunate injury.
“I’m sorry for getting in the way,” she mumbled as she wound the gauze around his arm, trying not to get too put off by the grisly state of his cut. “Mao didn’t tell me what was going on when he came to get me. He said you needed help, that you were in trouble, so I just--”
“It’s fine,” he replied, his tone taking on a soft edge that made her heart melt just a little. “I know you were only trying to help. And I’m sorry for…look, I just really think--”
“You want me to stay out of this?” she prompted, raising a brow.
“Yeah, and I’m going to keep saying that until you listen to me.”
“You’re going to be wasting a lot of words, then,” her reply emanated a lightheartedness of its own, an aura of generosity she was desperate to communicate to him. “Like I’ve said before, and I’m going to keep saying every time you try to talk me out of this, I’m already involved. Whether I want to be or not…I kind of always have been. I’m tied to the Gate, and it’s even caused me problems in the past, believe it or not. It’s not the end of the world. My world. At least, not yet.”
“And I don’t want to end up being the reason it is,” he replied, wincing a bit as she clumsily wrestled with the bandages.
“Oh, I’m sorry. Am I hurting you?” she asked quickly, her eyes reflecting a sense of penitience that was almost comical to him.
“No, it’s fine,” he reassured, noticing the way her gaze wavered and fingers tensed any time her focus drifted too close to the site of the injury. “But are you alright? You seem a little--”
“I’m fine,” she assured hastily, trading her timid avoidance for a laser focus that made the corner of his mouth quirk up. “I’m sorry, I know I’m not the best at this--”
Her words trickled off as he placed a hand over hers, prompting her to raise her anxious gaze to meet his own, which was calm and clear. “Does the sight of blood make you queasy?”
“What?” she stuttered, turning away in an attempt to hide her mortified expression. “No, of course not--”
“C’mon, is this really the time to lie about something like that?” he chided, taking the gauze from her unsteady hands, which were only growing more unsteady by the second. “I can take it from here. Thank you for offering to help in the first place…for showing up at all. I suppose I should be grateful you didn’t just brush off Mao’s warning like it was nothing.”
“Wow, you’re actually thanking me now? That’s a first,” she remarked before she could stop herself, scrambling to gather her thoughts and apologize before he could get a word in.
“Yeah, I know.” Unfortunately, it seemed she was too late. “I’m sorry for giving you such a hard time. For saying some of the things I did…”
“Well, I can understand being grumpy,” she replied with a shrug. “Especially after everything you had to deal with, everything you just went through.”
“That’s nothing,” he assured nonchalantly, and she could tell that he meant it, which only exacerbated her distress. “And this,” he gestured to his arm, “isn’t a big deal, either. It’ll heal up in a few days. I’m used to stuff like this.”
“That doesn’t make it okay--”
“Maybe not,” he conceded. “But that’s just how things are. And I hope it helps you appreciate exactly why I’m so adamant about you going back to your life the way it was before you found out about all of this, leaving this kind of stuff behind and running as far away from it as possible.”
But that means I’ll have to run away from you, too. She thought, her ears drooping in dejection. “Yeah, I can see why. And I appreciate your concern. But you have to understand that I’m just as…concerned about you…”
“Why should you be?” An uncomfortable beat of silence thickened the air between them. “I mean, this is just my job. I’ve been doing it for a while, I’m used to it. I understand the risks, the routine. So you really shouldn’t be wasting your worries on a random stranger like me.”
Stranger? She clenched her hands, staring pointedly at the floor by his feet. “For the same reason you’re concerned about me getting involved, right? You’re not responsible for me, or anything that happens to me. And if you do happen to feel that way, that’s on you. I never asked you to worry about me, or protect me, or anything like that. I don’t even expect those kinds of things from you. I just…I don’t know…”
Her hands began to tremble, and he reached out to place one on top of her own a second time. She didn’t react, and he wasn’t going to push it or try to convince her to look at him. She’d already been through so much tonight, and all because of him. He couldn’t help feeling guilty, but if she didn’t want him to bear such a burden, he’d keep those feelings to himself. Right now, all that mattered was that she was here, and she wanted to stay. At this rate, he didn’t think he’d manage to find the strength to keep turning her away.
“It’s okay,” he murmured, and her ears perked up. “If you’re really that serious about it, I know I can’t stop you. But, please, try to be at least a little more careful from now on. For me?”
For you? She lifted her head, searching his eyes for something, anything that might indicate or explain what had caused his sudden, drastic change of heart. “All I want to do is help you.”
He chuckled dryly, wrapping his good arm around her shoulders before pulling her to his side. “Alright, fine. If I say you can help, would that make you happy? But only if you promise to leave the dangerous, life threatening stuff to me. Deal?”
“Do I really have to leave that kind of stuff to you?”
“Yes.”
She exhaled a heavy, reluctant sigh. “Well, I guess if I don’t have any other choice. Alright. I’ll do my best to stay out of your way…”
If that was what it was going to take for her to be able to stay by his side, then so be it. Ultimately, that was all that really mattered to her. Even if she didn’t entirely understand why…and he didn’t, either. But surely, despite the odds, they must have finally been taking a step in the right direction.
Summary: Awoken from her slumber by the sound of frantic scratching at her window in the middle of the night, Nova is drawn into a conflict that she knows she’s better off avoiding…but when it comes to him, she just can’t seem to stay away.
Author’s Note: The last of my loosely associated 3 part drabble set for this week, and I can’t believe how long it ended up being fhieslfes I really am just on a roll when it comes to this stuff. I’m not sure if my posting will start to slow down a little soon because I’m starting to get a little busy with other things, but I still plan on posting more fics for this ship (and others) it’s just that this one, obviously, inspires me in a way I haven’t encountered in awhile, which is pretty nice…I guess I don’t have too much more to say than that lol. Thank you for reading! :D
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“Nova! Nova, wake up!”
That voice…it was vaguely familiar to her, although not instantly recognizable. It didn’t sound like the product of just another dream; it was too clear, too defined. The grating noise of something sharp frantically scraping against glass jarred her even more, and the young woman’s ears twitched as she struggled to open her eyes, glancing around without making any effort to move just yet. The scraping intensified, the voice continued beckoning to her in that same distressed tone, begging her to do something she couldn’t quite make out. Rubbing her eyes and pushing the covers back, she sat up slowly, posture going rigid as her eyes finally fell upon the form that was awaiting her at the window.
“C’mon, don’t just sit there and stare! Let me in!”
Throwing the covers off and sliding out of bed in one smooth motion, Nova hurried over and pushed the panes open as quickly and quietly as she could manage. “Mao? What are you--?”
The lean black cat cut her off. “There’s no time. I need you to transform and come with me--”
“Wait, what?”
“I just said there’s no time!”
Well, that may have been true, but she had no way of knowing why, or what the panicked feline’s urgent words were referring to. “Yeah, but I’m not--”
“I’ll explain on the way, just come on!”
She looked over her shoulder at the dark, hushed room she’d be leaving behind, feeling the cold tendrils of apprehension and worry pinning her to the spot. Whatever it was he wanted her for, it couldn’t have been anything good, judging by the desperation in his eyes and tone. Was she really prepared to go barreling head first into a dangerous situation, one that she had no way of knowing or even predicting the details of? Wouldn’t it be better for her to convince him to give her at least some sort of explanation before she decided (perhaps unwisely) to get involved in whatever he was so insistent on receiving her help with?
“Mao, listen to me, I’m not--”
“Hei’s in trouble!”
Ah, those were simultaneously the words she needed to hear most, and the words she wished she’d never heard in the first place. How could she possibly turn him down or convince herself to back out when he appealed to her with something like that? Cursing under her breath, she threw on the first acceptable outfit she could find before taking on her feline form and following him back down the route he’d taken to reach her. Rushing through the streets like their lives depended on it, Nova knew that although theirs weren’t necessarily on the line at the moment, someone else’s definitely was, and that solitary thought seemed to be the only one her mind was capable of focusing on.
The perpetually moonless nights always filled her with an unfortunate, almost nostalgic sense of melancholy. She’d been plagued by bittersweet feelings ever since that tragic day had struck little more than a decade ago, forever altering the appearance of the world, and more importantly changing the shape of its course. The absence of that soothing silver glow that never failed to make her feel serene and at peace was striking, devastating…it was a glow that she could look upon and smile almost every time without fail, reflecting on and admiring the beauty of that radiant, ethereal light.
There was no such light to guide her or illuminate her destination this evening, though; only the blur of black fur that she struggled to keep up with as it raced down narrow alleyways and skidded around structures as her own paws pounded across the pavement, fiercely fighting to keep up. She wanted to ask him what was wrong, where they were going, to find out exactly what kind of trouble he was leading her to…but part of her also didn’t care. If Hei was in trouble and needed her help, what did the circumstances or specifics of the situation really matter? She wasn’t suddenly going to turn her back on him or change her mind, even if she knew that would be best. Lately, she’d become more and more insufferable in that regard, even more of a stranger to herself.
Rounding another corner, Nova barely managed to duck and roll out of the way of fumbling steps as she unexpectedly got caught up in the thick of battle. Paws scrabbling across the asphalt, she hissed and dodged to and fro, seeking out the quickest route to remove her from the immediate path of danger. She couldn’t tell whose feet were whose from this height, from this angle, and she paused to catch her breath once she’d finally managed to steer clear of being stepped on. Turning her gaze skywards to determine who was who in this startlingly frantic free for all, she managed to pick out the form of the man that she’d come for with relative ease…luckily for him, the familiar sight of his uniform made him easy to pick out.
Eyes darting around like a fly, frantically searching for the first opening that presented itself, Nova launched herself at one of the stragglers. She caught them just as they were raising their arm, preparing to fire a potentially lethal shot into the fray. Ensuring she angled herself just enough to land a blow that knocked them off balance, she scrambled up the perpetrator’s arm, digging her claws into their shoulder before assaulting their vulnerable face with a merciless barrage of razor sharp swipes. Swaying and stumbling around as they struggled to process what was happening, what strange creature had attacked them, Nova heard Mao shout something that she couldn’t make out from the chaos of her current position. The familiar sound of Hei’s cord cut through the air not long after, securing itself around the target’s neck while still managing to avoid her somehow; an impressive testament to his experience and skill.
“Move!” His voice caught her off guard, and her brain lagged between the battle she was currently engaged in and her struggle to interpret exactly what he was saying, what his command meant…that it was directed at her in the first place. “Nova, move now! Right now!”
His repetition seemed to jar her mind enough to make his words make sense, or at least compel her to act. Kicking off the stranger as hard as she could, she didn’t have enough time to determine where she was launching herself in the first place. She wasn’t preoccupied by that concern for long, though, as it was swiftly swept away by the distraction of the abrupt, alarming crackle of electricity that raised her fur as soon as she’d broken physical contact with her previous opponent. The sparking energy that made the back half of her fur stand on end sent her into a panic, and she hit the ground with a thud, ears ringing and vision blurring a bit as she shook her head in an attempt to expedite her recovery.
There wasn’t any time to spare. As soon as her vision cleared and came into focus, Nova caught sight of another assailant advancing on Hei from behind. Exchanging a swift, silent look of understanding with Mao, the two raven-furred felines raced forward, ambushing the attacker from above and below simultaneously. Nova could tell that Hei must have been caught up in this skirmish for a while, or the fight had just been arduous enough to take a lot out of him, if the labored sound of his ragged panting was any indication. His movements and strikes didn’t waver in the slightest, though, and both she and Mao dodged out of the way just in time for him to knock his opponent’s feet out from under them.
Nova stood back and watched in mild horror as Hei slammed their head to the ground, obscuring their face with his hand as he delivered a final shock that quickly turned their seizing body to stillness. Getting back on his feet after ensuring that the job was indeed done, Hei did a quick sweep of their surroundings before carefully removing his mask. Nova didn’t fail to notice the way his hands trembled, and the sight of it made her heart ache with a sympathy, a tenderness that she knew she needed to avoid feeling towards him at all costs.
“What the hell were you thinking?”
The angry edge in his voice made her flinch, and Nova curled in on herself, tucking her tail around her paws. Swiveling her ears, the young woman realized as the conversation continued that the irritated accusation wasn’t actually directed at her, and she craned her neck to watch as this new, heated conflict played out before her.
“Bringing her here, getting her involved…what’s wrong with you?”
“What’s wrong with me?” Mao scoffed, his tail twitching in indignance. “What’s wrong with you? I just saved your life, we both did--”
“I had it under control--”
“Oh, bullshit.” His tail lashed more fiercely in exasperation, his physical stance reflecting the depth of his annoyance and frustration with Hei’s apparent lack of gratitude. “Just like you always have it under control, right? Just like you can lone wolf every assignment you’re given? And that’s why you were assigned a team in the first place, right? So you can just brush us off after you get the info, whenever it’s convenient for you--”
“She’s not one of us!” Hei snapped, gesturing sharply in her direction. Nova winced, ears pinned flat against her head as she shrunk against the ground. The way he singled her out only made her feel worse, and she couldn’t help thinking he wouldn’t have been half as upset if she wasn’t so useless, nothing more than an unfortunate liability. “None of this has anything to do with her, and your first thought was to go out of your way to drag her into it anyway? Seriously, what were you thinking? She’s not just another operative, or even a proper Contractor. What did you expect her to do, did you really think she’d be able to--”
“But she did help!” Mao defended hotly, circling around to stand in front of her. “She--”
“Yeah, she got in the way, and almost ended up shocked to death as a result. Is that what being helpful is to you?”
“Just shut up! Shut up! That’s enough!” A painful silence permeated the air as Nova reverted to her human form, wiping some tears from her eyes as she stood. “I get it, alright? I’m sorry I’m not formidable and reliable like you, I’m sorry I don’t have any cool, lethal powers that--”
“It’s not about that,” he barked, flourishing his arm in a heated gesture of negation. The desolate, almost pitiable look in his eyes practically shattered her heart on the spot. “None of this is. Do you not remember anything I told you before? About how dangerous this shit is? About how you’re smart, capable, and you need to use that to get as far away from all of this as possible--”
“What you gave me was advice,” she corrected curtly. “Advice that I can choose to take or leave. But you can’t tell me what to do. You can’t make me stay away, stay out of all of this if I don’t want to. I’m not stupid, I understand the risks.”
“No, clearly, you don’t,” he retorted bitterly. “Because if you did--”
“Hey, can I get, like, a thank you or something at least?” she huffed, crossing her arms. “If it’s so dangerous and everything, don’t you think I deserve that much? I mean, I showed up despite the risks because I was worried--”
“Is that what you want?” he asked, his demeanor turning cold and mocking as he brushed by her, purposefully shoving her out of the way as he went. “A medal? Some kind of reward for showing up and getting in the way?”
Well, now she was really getting angry. If his goal was to offend her, he was doing quite a stellar job of it. She turned to face him as he stalked off, her blood boiling resentfully in her veins. “No, smartass, I think some basic respect and gratitude is the least you could--”
The remainder of her riled up retort got stuck in her throat as she noticed the slight, almost imperceptible way he wobbled as he walked. She narrowed her eyes, realizing upon closer inspection that he was holding one of his arms; and not in a casual, normal way, either. She took a few cautious steps towards him and reached out, stopping him in his tracks. He winced at her touch and tried to pull away as she coaxed him to reveal his arm, but she endured despite his protests. Tightening her grip, she managed to convince him to unveil the injury he was so stubbornly bent on concealing.
“Look, it’s nothing. I’m fine, would you just--”
“You’re fine?” Nova replied incredulously, doing her best to not dissolve into tears at the sight of the angry red gash that tore through both fabric and skin.
“Yes, I’m fine,” he repeated, trying to swallow the mixture of resentment and shame he felt when she looked at him like that. “I’m used to it, it’s nothing I can’t--”
“Hei, shut up,” she interrupted weakly, doing her best to reinforce her resolve, to hold herself together in the face of his foolish pride. “You’re not fine, and even if you were, I’m not going to just ignore this. You’re hurt, period. It needs to be treated--”
“I’ll do it myself,” he insisted, jerking his arm away and gritting his teeth as he instantly regretted the force of the movement. “I always do.”
“That doesn’t make it okay…” Nova muttered under her breath. “Will you at least let me help you take care of it?”
“What?” he asked, blinking a few times in confusion. He certainly wasn’t used to receiving such kind offers…he couldn’t even remember the last time someone had helped him treat his wounds, or even offered to.
“Let me go back with you. I’ll be discreet, I swear. I’ll even climb up the tree by the window and come in as a cat if you want. I won’t draw any suspicion. Seriously, I just…” She wrung her hands sheepishly, dropping her gaze to the ground and obscuring her flushed face with her hair as she continued, “I just want to make sure you’re alright.”
Well, he couldn’t exactly say no to that, could he? Maybe he could, but he’d just end up looking like an even bigger asshole, and despite his reservations he didn’t really have it in him to push back any harder than he already was. Obviously she wasn’t going to just drop the issue…and there was something in the way her voice quivered when she spoke that softened his heart and his resolve.
“Fine. I’ll let you in through the window.”
Taken aback by his sudden change of heart, Nova morphed into her cat form without another word, sprinting off in the direction of his apartment. It was almost dismaying that she found the place so easily…it wasn’t like she visited that often, but her limbs moved on auto pilot, leading her back to the seemingly innocuous building that already held so many emotions and memories for her. Shuddering at the recollection of what had transpired the last time she’d been here, she did her best to push past it, scrambling up the tree outside his window with ease.
She draped herself across a branch while she waited for him, idly swaying her tail as she listened intently for the conspicuous click of a lock or creek of a door. This neighborhood was so quiet, peaceful…it struck her as somewhat strange, almost ironic, considering the activities that at least one of the building’s tenants regularly engaged in. She examined the branches that stretched and twisted all around her, almost like they were forming a nest of their own, dotted with delicate leaves and rocking gently in the occasional breeze that blew by.
The scene was so serene, so still…and yet a disturbing dispute had played out a mere few blocks away not even ten minutes ago. She glanced at the sparkling sheen of her tail, feeling a pang of nostalgic longing for the silvery light that should have been streaming through the branches, too, complementing the countless stars that glittered in the dark, gloomy sky. She knew that light was one she may never see again…but if the opportunity to appreciate it at least once more meant that the present stars would vanish, subsequently taking the man she’d come here to meet with them…it wasn’t worth it, at least in her eyes.
It took longer than she expected for him to return, but upon further consideration she realized he’d probably stopped to regroup with the rest of his team, or perhaps relay some kind of report. She’d already formed a questionably shaky alliance with Mao, if his willingness to beseech her aid was any indication, and she was at least vaguely aware of Yin’s presence and role in their little group. A Doll with the ability to see through water, the medium of her surveillance…she didn’t say much, just like any other Doll, and part of Nova wondered how she’d even ended up being recruited in the first place.
Then again, the less she knew about any of them, the better…but it didn’t seem like she was going to be able to maintain a reasonable distance for much longer. Not if she kept this up, if she kept going along with things, inserting herself even when she knew she wasn’t needed (or perhaps even wanted)…but she just couldn’t seem to help herself. And hey, even if Mao’s judgment wasn’t the best, the fact that he considered her a viable asset at all brought her a rare sense of fulfillment she knew she needed to ignore, but that she relished and appreciated anyway. At least someone thought she could be useful for something, for once.
She perked up as she finally heard him arrive, swiveling her ears as she crept towards the end of the branch and waited for him to slide the glass open so she could make her way inside. She cleared the thin bars that formed a kind of barrier under the windowsill, landing on the firm floor of the interior with the same poise and grace that could be expected of any feline. Although her cat form was unique and convenient, she wasn’t actually in the habit of employing it that much outside of special circumstances where it just seemed the most natural thing to do. She had to admit, she’d been getting more mileage out of this form over the past few weeks than she had in months. It felt a bit peculiar to be using it as a means to meet up with someone rather than just a reliable way to avoid her problems for a while.
Transitioning to her human form as Hei shut the window and drew the curtain behind her, she got to work sifting through the first aid kit he’d apparently already laid out on the floor. She didn’t know the first thing about first aid, honestly, but wrapping a wound couldn’t be that hard, right? She knew that was a stupid assumption to make, but she couldn’t just do nothing, she couldn’t live with herself if she’d just run off and let him drag himself back here to tend to his wounds all on his own. Sure, he may have been used to it, but that seemed like such a lonely, depressing existence in her eyes…despite knowing how upset he must still be with her, she couldn’t turn her back on him. The truth was that, as she’d stated before, all she really wanted was to make sure he was okay.
She waited for him to get himself settled, examining him with hesitant, guilty eyes. Here, behind closed doors, it was almost as if all the life had drained from his face, and even his entire form. In the company of someone that knew the truth, he didn’t have to put on a performance, to pretend to be someone or something he wasn’t. But the sight of his true face, the emptiness and misery that seemed to practically pulse out of his every pore…that was almost more painful to her than the sight of his unfortunate injury.
“I’m sorry for getting in the way,” she mumbled as she wound the gauze around his arm, trying not to get too put off by the grisly state of his cut. “Mao didn’t tell me what was going on when he came to get me. He said you needed help, that you were in trouble, so I just--”
“It’s fine,” he replied, his tone taking on a soft edge that made her heart melt just a little. “I know you were only trying to help. And I’m sorry for…look, I just really think--”
“You want me to stay out of this?” she prompted, raising a brow.
“Yeah, and I’m going to keep saying that until you listen to me.”
“You’re going to be wasting a lot of words, then,” her reply emanated a lightheartedness of its own, an aura of generosity she was desperate to communicate to him. “Like I’ve said before, and I’m going to keep saying every time you try to talk me out of this, I’m already involved. Whether I want to be or not…I kind of always have been. I’m tied to the Gate, and it’s even caused me problems in the past, believe it or not. It’s not the end of the world. My world. At least, not yet.”
“And I don’t want to end up being the reason it is,” he replied, wincing a bit as she clumsily wrestled with the bandages.
“Oh, I’m sorry. Am I hurting you?” she asked quickly, her eyes reflecting a sense of penitience that was almost comical to him.
“No, it’s fine,” he reassured, noticing the way her gaze wavered and fingers tensed any time her focus drifted too close to the site of the injury. “But are you alright? You seem a little--”
“I’m fine,” she assured hastily, trading her timid avoidance for a laser focus that made the corner of his mouth quirk up. “I’m sorry, I know I’m not the best at this--”
Her words trickled off as he placed a hand over hers, prompting her to raise her anxious gaze to meet his own, which was calm and clear. “Does the sight of blood make you queasy?”
“What?” she stuttered, turning away in an attempt to hide her mortified expression. “No, of course not--”
“C’mon, is this really the time to lie about something like that?” he chided, taking the gauze from her unsteady hands, which were only growing more unsteady by the second. “I can take it from here. Thank you for offering to help in the first place…for showing up at all. I suppose I should be grateful you didn’t just brush off Mao’s warning like it was nothing.”
“Wow, you’re actually thanking me now? That’s a first,” she remarked before she could stop herself, scrambling to gather her thoughts and apologize before he could get a word in.
“Yeah, I know.” Unfortunately, it seemed she was too late. “I’m sorry for giving you such a hard time. For saying some of the things I did…”
“Well, I can understand being grumpy,” she replied with a shrug. “Especially after everything you had to deal with, everything you just went through.”
“That’s nothing,” he assured nonchalantly, and she could tell that he meant it, which only exacerbated her distress. “And this,” he gestured to his arm, “isn’t a big deal, either. It’ll heal up in a few days. I’m used to stuff like this.”
“That doesn’t make it okay--”
“Maybe not,” he conceded. “But that’s just how things are. And I hope it helps you appreciate exactly why I’m so adamant about you going back to your life the way it was before you found out about all of this, leaving this kind of stuff behind and running as far away from it as possible.”
But that means I’ll have to run away from you, too. She thought, her ears drooping in dejection. “Yeah, I can see why. And I appreciate your concern. But you have to understand that I’m just as…concerned about you…”
“Why should you be?” An uncomfortable beat of silence thickened the air between them. “I mean, this is just my job. I’ve been doing it for a while, I’m used to it. I understand the risks, the routine. So you really shouldn’t be wasting your worries on a random stranger like me.”
Stranger? She clenched her hands, staring pointedly at the floor by his feet. “For the same reason you’re concerned about me getting involved, right? You’re not responsible for me, or anything that happens to me. And if you do happen to feel that way, that’s on you. I never asked you to worry about me, or protect me, or anything like that. I don’t even expect those kinds of things from you. I just…I don’t know…”
Her hands began to tremble, and he reached out to place one on top of her own a second time. She didn’t react, and he wasn’t going to push it or try to convince her to look at him. She’d already been through so much tonight, and all because of him. He couldn’t help feeling guilty, but if she didn’t want him to bear such a burden, he’d keep those feelings to himself. Right now, all that mattered was that she was here, and she wanted to stay. At this rate, he didn’t think he’d manage to find the strength to keep turning her away.
“It’s okay,” he murmured, and her ears perked up. “If you’re really that serious about it, I know I can’t stop you. But, please, try to be at least a little more careful from now on. For me?”
For you? She lifted her head, searching his eyes for something, anything that might indicate or explain what had caused his sudden, drastic change of heart. “All I want to do is help you.”
He chuckled dryly, wrapping his good arm around her shoulders before pulling her to his side. “Alright, fine. If I say you can help, would that make you happy? But only if you promise to leave the dangerous, life threatening stuff to me. Deal?”
“Do I really have to leave that kind of stuff to you?”
“Yes.”
She exhaled a heavy, reluctant sigh. “Well, I guess if I don’t have any other choice. Alright. I’ll do my best to stay out of your way…”
If that was what it was going to take for her to be able to stay by his side, then so be it. Ultimately, that was all that really mattered to her. Even if she didn’t entirely understand why…and he didn’t, either. But surely, despite the odds, they must have finally been taking a step in the right direction.